Flibbertygibbet

Just which flavour of crazy are you?

Warning - long, long, long post.

Initially this post was mainly to confess how I woke up on Sunday morning and hit the cat across the head.

Well, the night before it was just too much effort to persuade [bad] Shrimp to come out from under the bed when it was time to sleep, so I gave up and left the door open, figuring that she'd sneak out in the night.  Which she did, but of course she could also saunter back in when she felt it was breakfast time the next morning.  Early the next morning.  The current fun game is to pounce on anything that either moves, or shows itself under the (very light summer) duvet and so she kept attacking my feet - you know it's hard to stay still and ignore razor sharp claws for any length of time even if you empirically believe that lack of attention should make her stop.  Eventually I gave in, and dramatically swept the covers back across the king-sized bed to get up.  In the process, I walloped the other poor mog, who'd also crept in but who was peacefully snoozing alongside me on the bed and scared the crap out of myself in the process.  Poor Twiglet. 

But a couple of things have got me a little worried, or a little peeved, or confused.  Or something.

It's mainly wondering how I got to be the incarnation of Crazy Aunt Purl's forthcoming book - "Drunk, Divorced and Covered in Cat Hair: The true life misadventures of a thirty-something who learned to knit after he split".   God I cannot wait to read it. I already know it's going to make me laugh and cry, very very much. 

Lovely Ting said something one day about how it's cute that my blog is all about my cats (she almost undoubtedly didn't say precisely that, but that was what I heard) and that made me think:

- Oh. 
I may be becoming a crazy cat lady.

And then I thought:

- But isn't it a bit early for that? 

and settled back on the sofa, flanked by a cat or two, with my knitting, or more recently, crochet* to watch some tv.

You see, I'm getting very into Grey's Anatomy.  Loving it.  McDreamy, McSteamy, George, the whole lot.  But I must take issue with something that peturbed me greatly.  In the two eps that aired tonight, Meredith is having yet another crisis and so she takes up knitting. Or rather Izzie is knitting something she claims she's going to substitute for Meredith's crap efforts - but Meredith is supposedly knitting a sweater on enormous broomstick needles which looks to actually be a large piece of stocking stitch - a scarf, perhaps - but the point is, the point is, the point is that Meredith takes up knitting because she's becoming celibate after repeatedly screwing up with men.  She's sitting in the bar and the barman tells her she has to stop knitting because she's scaring off the customers.  Then the nurse at McVet's asks her how she's getting on with learning to knit, and when did she give up men.  She's basically knitting to avoid, and indeed distance herself from, any male attention.  Because men stay away from psycho knitter ladies.  Particularly ones with cats.

Now I know that's crazy talk.  But a lightbulb went off in my head.  I realised I may be knitting myself a divorce.  And a security cordon.  I've been thinking a lot about the amount of crafting I've been doing and how important it has been to me over the past turbulent months.  It's been a relief (or, as I mistyped, a "relife") to be able to take time to knit, crochet, dressmake, create, keep my mind and hands occupied and have a tangible object at the end of it.  If I'd been working, while I'd have had a different focus (and also some financial security), I think I might not have handled things 'so well' because I don't know if I would have had anything that I could have literally picked up and said 'Yes, I made this' I have talents.  I can do things. Subtext - I can get through this.  I can sort myself and this mess out.

I've admitted before that crafting has been how I've been keeping myself semi-sane up to now (can you tell that serenity may be about to disappear?) mainly because I've met a lot of wonderful knitterly people and it's been a lifeline, it and the people it's introduced me to have become a regular part of my social life.  Somehow it feels like it's almost cheating because none of these people know XH.  A new life, new start.  That's another reason why I love London - it's big enough to reinvent yourself without even changing your postcode.  I can tell these people I've had a crap time or the divorce is getting me down or whatever, and people are simply sympathetic.  There's no 'poor XH.  We feel for him too." It's unconditional. The support is just for me. Nobody asks 'Are you at fault at all?'

Am I immersing myself in crafts to avoid the real world of job-hunting and house-hunting and no-more-Tuesdays-at-Foyles, doing a Meredith and trying to maintain a distance from reality? (Apparently the world out there has men in it too, I'm not sure whether I'm more afraid of men or work.  Men at work.  Working with men.  Not working. No men.  Meeting a new man.)

And then there's the blog too.  A non-knitter, non-blogger friend asked me with that slightly wary look, 'Why do you have a blog?'  and of course the answer is 'It's cheaper than therapy".  I am very grateful to all the wonderful people (the friends from the real world, and the 'imaginary friends' from the virtual world) who have encouraged and supported,  cajoled and pacified me, sent care packages and come out for cocktails. It's been a whole different life for me in the past year but I'm glad to have 'met' new people who've made it that much more interesting - even if some times I wonder 'Why would you care about what I'm saying on this blog? Doesn't my whining drive you mad?  Do you think I'm funny or just in need of medication? Actually, is there anyone out there at all?  Oh god, am I blathering into empty cyberspace??'  I've been thinking about this a lot because of an email I got the other day. I've done a couple of interviews lately, one for an American newspaper's St Patrick's Day edition about Irish crafters, and I was interviewed for a piece in the Guardian about refashioning clothes and dressmaking.  Then I had a rather unexpected request:  if XH and I would like to be in one of the broadsheet supplements, in a feature where two people who have separated both give their side of the story.  I have to admit that I was flattered that I'd been asked, as they are "always looking for interesting and articulate subjects' but I realised that I wasn't interested in having my story told in that way, and I wondered who would want to bare their souls like that and what their motivation would be.

Then I thought about it a little more and realised that while I'm not 100% open, I do talk about this sort of thing on the blog without much caution.  I might not say it in  person to a friend but ironically I'm happy to stick it up here and let it exist as a sort of adjunct to my existence.  A very open secret.  It's like purging your soul to a diary, but crisp white paper , much as I love it, doesn't give you constructive feedback.  There have been a few posts recently in blogland about reading, commenting and lurking.  I'd like to say thanks, again, to everyone who comes to visit here.  Please leave a comment because I'd love to know who you are.  I'm going to make an effort to reply to all my comments - been a bit slow at this recently - and I'd encourage you to leave comments on blogs when you read them - because it's important to make those connections.  For both the reader and the author.

I'll be out of blogland for a while, not expecting to have internet access when I'm in Ireland.  Attending a wedding, seeing some people I haven't seen since my own wedding, gulp.  Gearing myself up for the househunt and the job hunt.  The crunch time really has come.  No more hiding behing the yarn, changes are inevitable.  The decree nisi is due any day now. I'll look forward to seeing what you though of this rambling epistle when I return!  Well done for getting this far...

* I caved and started over. Longer, no mistakes (so far) and up to 'gift' standard.  What was I thinking with the first one?? It's barely a scarf!  It's being ripped. The second one might become a lap rug for me if I've got enough yarn left over.  I love Cotton Angora, btw.

My kind of day

Actually, it didn't start off so well.  I intended to go to the London Sewing meet up over in west London for an hour or so before retreating back east for a knitting afternoon.  Or crochet, in my case.  Before I left the house I pressed and turned under the hem on the Liberty silk dress from the last post, so that I could hem it at the meet up.  Left the house, jumped on the tube, got as far as Tower Hill, and thought:

"Shit.
Did I unplug the iron?"*

I called my neighbour to ask her to pop in but she was out ferrying a plethora of small children to social appointments, so I had to abort the mission and come home.  With an extra hour or so to kill I finally got around to making my Tie One On Apron for this month.  Both Jennifer and Anna were kind enough to send me some rickrack when I bemoaned its lack of availability here (in interesting colours and widths).  So here it is:

It's on Dolly and  pinned a little crooked but you get the idea, I'm pleased with it.  The theme was rickrack so it's around the bottom and peeping out from the pocket (because an apron without a pocket is pointless though on reflection the pocket doesn't actually have to be big enough to fit a cookbook in).  It's made from a thrifted pillowcase and some pink cotton from the stash.

Now I just need an excuse to do some baking.  Magnolia cupcakes and pistachio macaroons and cherry biscuits and oh god I better stop myself now.

Then it was off to Broadway Market, for pints of chips and more rippling, with   four very lovely ladies.   Just like Claire, right now I'm all about the crochet, and the rippling in particular.  It won't be ready to bring to the wedding next week, but that's ok.  At this stage I've started it twice,

and at now 45" (these are different colours so it's not that your computer screen needs adjusting, top is the first blanket and below is the current one).  I'm still not sure it's wide enough but I don't feel like starting it a third time. It might get a big border instead.  I've worked out that the ripples take up so much of the foundation chain that you've got to chain about a third more than you think you need.

So soon I'll have to start temping or working properly in a grown-up job, god forbid, but at the moment I'm making the most of the last days of my freedom.  That has also included a couple of cinema trips this week with Jen - and as she pointed out, we saw two Chinese films. 

Curse of the Golden Flower was great.  It's a little like Eastenders in fluoro colours, because it has all the intrigue, back-stabbing and general human misery of a soap but it's extravagantly beautiful.  It was slightly frustrating when the subtitles disappeared - literally at the dramatic climax - but we figured it out.  The costumes are divine.  It's relatively slow-moving but I was caught up in the sheer spectacle of it all.  What I know about Chinese history could fit on the head of a pin, but the film illuminated how tradition and a sense of order and propriety dominated then  - even when life is collapsing for all the main characters, as part of the Emperor's family - their lives were rigid, bound by strict codes and therefore when the emotions come to the fore in the film it's all the more powerful.

Which, in some ways, was similar to The Painted Veil. Someone (Ting?) volunteered that the title of the film alludes to people revealing their true selves. Yes, again the costumes (Kitty Fane's tea dresses - covet... fawn... and the parasols!!) were just fabulous, especially as I fancy myself in a cotton tea dress more than the Empress's huge robes.
I actually found it very moving - when the tide turns and the emotional current changes, it's very powerful.  So much so that I didn't mind Naomi Rubber Face Watts.  And yes, Edward Norton is stoic and dashing and just rather swoonsome. Go and see it.

So else got the Liberty 15% discount voucher (online, when they registered with the new site) that has no date, and no 'can only be used once' stipulation on it, and said 'hooray'?  Who has managed to use it?  I was pretty peeved that they wouldn't accept it the other day.  They seem to have omitted some of the terms and conditions on it but have just decided not to take it in the shop.  Doesn't seem fair really...

* yes

Busyness

I did say in my last post that I'd make a dress.

I just didn't make the one I thought I'd make.  Rather than the Liberty cotton from the other day, I realised I'd better get a move on with the dress for the wedding.  It's next week.

Can I just say (in my defence, m'lud) that it actually hangs better on me than on Dolly - I must adjust her padding.  I remembered that I don't have a zipper foot for my Janome, only for the Singer which is the workhorse, and frankly I don't want to put Liberty silk through it, just in case I foul it up. And also I bought a cream invisible zipper - which is invisible, indeed, in the body of the dress but the pull is visible at the top of the chocolate bodice, so I'll also have to look for a more suitable one in John Lewis along with a zipper foot.

The carpet blanket (which is going to require double my original quantity of wool, I reckon so I'll have to wait a bit to make that investment - will just work through what I have first) is coming along.

And I've got a mountain of cotton angora to make the wedding present throw.  I've got ten balls each of the lilac, lavender and pink, with a few random balls of purple, blue and light blue.   Now if I could only figure out the soft waves pattern... I've also been having problems with various hooks, metal and bamboo seem to work for me, but not plastic.  What's that?  A poor crafter blames her tools?

Knitting and fabric and SUNSHINE

Today was a rather nice day, all in all.  I just about made it to Knitflicks before the movie started, frantically texting Claire en route, as I was late, plus I didn't actually know where the cinema was either, but luckily it's just past the tube (and also past Electric Avenue "wooooaaah, we gonna walk down to -").  Anna was asking me what Knitflicks is about - basically once a month, the Ritzy in Brixton (just about) puts on a movie specifically for knitters and crafters where the lights are not quite dimmed.  So it's dark enough for the cinematic experience, but bright enough to see your work.  Well just about, at one point a friend, Adrienne, sitting behind me, did curse loudly and have to remove herself to fix a mistake outside in the light.  Another pal told me that her local cinema does something similar for mums and babies, with the lights keep up so little kids aren't too scared.  Or something. 

I have to admit, I was concentrating more on the work so I didn't watch the movie so much and it was such a shame because it was a stunning looking film, though even if I had been paying complete attention I don't reckon I've had understood it.  But it was worth it just for the odd glimpse of Cillian Murphy's beautiful blue eyes above the yarn. So I think Jen and I might have to go and watch it again as a card movie. Afterwards, following a sandwich and more crafting at chatting at the Ritzy, I headed over westwards to meet up with Jen and Loba.  Fabric was purchased.  Liberty tana lawn at 50% off.  I swear I'm making a dress tomorrow.

That's if I can put the crochet down for long enough.  For those of you who kindly asked after it, here's what I'm doing - draped over Shrimp.  It's because the first time I saw a crocheted blanket I really liked, it was on Green Kitchen back in September and later there was Bella Dia - and coincidentally Michelle had been inspired by a post of Jane's with a post about someone else's striped blanket... then Jane then was largely responsible for the ripple craze which I think came next.  Very complicated.  I liked the simplicity of this, plus it reminded me of a very seventies carpet in my parents' house. I need to get this one out of my system first.  When choosing the fabrics today I also went back to the first thing I'd spotted again and again, though eventually I did go for something else (it was also uncanny how all the fabrics I picked out were the more expensive ones. I've always had good taste.)  Loba is thinking of making her first quilt and it was interesting to see how my brain seems to work when it comes to choosing colours to go together.  There'll be more musings on sewing versus knitting in my little brain later. 

It has slightly scared me that Jane said she used 925g of yarn.  Oh no, wait a minute, I've just added it up and it turns out that I've bought 850g for this.  Ah ha.  That really scares me.  But I bought most of it at 15% off at the Liberty cardholder's evening, some with my measly £5 voucher. I'm using Rowan Pure Wool DK but for my next one (please, don't laugh - I've decided to make an afghan for a wedding present for a friend.  It was nearly going to be in Kidsilk Haze - until I tried crocheting with it, and thought better of it when memories of my past battles with this delightful fluffy devil's spawn came flooding back) I ordered a pile of cotton angora from ebay instead. I got 29 balls for £60 inc postage which isn't bad.  I'll try another couple of auctions tomorrow to see if I can add to that pile, and then that's going to be a ripple blanket, a proper one this time.

And I'll define what's "proper".

Swap Round 3

Yup, it's that time again.  And we're back to me running it myself - to be honest, using Swap-Bot didn't make things any easier.  I hope that lots of you will join in, though this time there will be a limit to the amount of places in the swap to make it possible to administrate it and I am going to try to keep to the deadlines!

Here's the fine print:

• Sign-ups for the third round of the fabric swap are open now*, and to join in you need to email me, boutique [at] flibbertygibbet <dot> [co] <dot> {uk} or use the 'Email me' button above, with the following details:
  - your (real!) name
  - your postal address
  - your email address
  - your blog if you have one and would like your swap partners to be able to check it out to see what you're into.  And I'll send you the code for the great button that Justine designed, which you see in the sidebar - thank you, lovely lady!
  
• Sign-ups will close on the 7th of May, assuming that all the spots haven't already been filled before then.

• For this swap, you will send THREE co-ordinating STRIPS of 100% cotton fabric to 2 SWAP PARTNERS.  The strips should be 4 inches/ 10 centimetres wide, and the length of the fabric from selvedge to selvedge which will be approximately 42-44 inches, or 107-112 centimetres long.  Feel free to add in extras - check out the Flickr group to see what's been sent and received in the past.

• You'll receive your swap partners' postal addresses and contact details by the 12th May and you should send your packages off by the 20th May.  If you haven't received both your packages by 10th June, let me know!  This is an international swap, so please be aware that your partners may be anywhere, (most exotic locale to date - Uraguay) so you need to be happy to ship internationally.

Happy Swapping!!!

I don't like swearing

**&@!$%

Ok, to be honest, my language can be like a sailor's sometimes. Like I noticed last night when I was knitting that I was using more than my fair share of expletives, and this was before I noticed the mistakes I was making with the sock.  And can I just say - I think I am falling in love with crochet.  Keep watching this space.

Today I was swearing in the county court - swearing the affadavit to accompany my divorce petition. It's the first time I've ever done anything like that, it was strangely emotional and everything is such a learning curve. Afterwards I felt like swearing a lot at 'unnamed woman'. Instead I shed a couple of tears as I walked down the side of the courthouse, said thanks for my huge sunglasses that hide watery eyes, and got on with it.  It's just one more step in the process.  Soon I hope to be looking for a little place to live, just me and the cats, and, as my brother says, 'all your crafty shit'.

I - CAN'T - WAIT. 

First class

All quiet on the kitchen front after the crochet class had ended. 

Front:  the instructions and the pink and yellow square - I learned how to change colours.  And it all makes a lot more sense.
Middle:  the Natalie Bray book that Caroline lent me, the prequel to mine. 
Back: all the washing up that the lovely Emma helped me with, before I ran off to the mystery dinner (which was here - utterly fabulous, with some surreal moments involving being caught royally in the act of gossiping but I can't disclose it here without getting my host in trouble).

There were eight of us learning - Branwyn, Helen, Rebecca, Caroline, Claire, Isabelle, Caroline and me.  I was slightly distracted by things like having to hem the dress to wear out last night so I'll be needing the refresher (remedial?) class but Emma is a wonderful teacher.

Then today we went off to East Dulwich, and sat in Helen's garden knitting, crocheting, cooing at baby Louis and just generally amusing the hell out of each other.  What a great day.

If you bake it...

...they will come.

The refreshments for tomorrow are almost done.  Some bread baking and buttercream frosting to come in the morning.  Ye better bring your sweet tooths (teeth?) with you.

The earlier part of tonight was spent with P, celebrating good things, good friends, good news and good times.  All good, really...

As usual of late, I have ridiculously overcommitted myself from tomorrow through Thursday.  God help me.  And my liver. Bring it on!

What have I been up to?

Just not in a posting mood, I guess.  A lot of things swirling around my head.  Some potentials, some concerns, some concepts, some inspirations.  And doing naughty things like procrastinating about working, and instead celebrating Pauline's return/last day of freedom by shoe-shopping - for her, not for me.

Last Sunday, rather than hastily unwrapping shiny foil from a bushel of chocolate (I musn't be well) my fingers were otherwise employed... learning to crochet at Fabrications, with Ting.   Well, Rachel Matthews was the teacher, sweet lady.  She was certainly patient...

So yes, I have to admit that I'm getting a bit of a head start before Saturday, when there's a group of lovelies coming here to learn to crochet with Emma, a friend who's a freelance designer and who teaches crochet and knitting.  (BTW I think there's some people who might have been interested that I didn't think of - so let me know if you're keen in case I do it again?  Pending how it all goes on Saturday!)

Don't worry - it's not like I made much progress.  You want proof?  Here it is.  It's not so much crochet as woolly chain mail.  And I still wasn't entirely sure what I was doing by the end of it, but it was good fun.  Ting claims she made a jellyfish but I thought it looked like a map of Africa.

And as for the current controvery - ripple blanket versus granny squares - it's really difficult to decide, but I might end up going for the other option, which I think Helen suggested to me earlier - the Babette.  That's when I'm not making tea for the ladies, of course.

Did anyone watch the BBC4 programme 'Thoroughly Modern Antiques' - all about fashion and Christian Dior's New Look?  It's fascinating.  And featured the sort of dresses I love.  It's just reinforcing my desire to go to the market tomorrow and buy that flowery fabric I wished I'd bought last week...

Just wanted to check: a few people checked up on their swap packages and I've sent off the relevant emails and hopefully got back to people... is anyone still waiting?

(Apart from Leigh - your necklace will be posted tomorrow!)

Stash-busting

It's New Look 6588 but I decided I wasn't going to do the casing and put in four lines of elastic (mainly because I am a lazy cow, but also because I didn't think it would actually be that comfortable or attractive), so I used shirring elastic to gather it instead and sewed the gathered skirt straight to the bodice. I also learned a bit more about working with diagonals, ahem. 
The pattern has a lot of ease in it so next time I make it (possibly tomorrow) I'd cut out a smaller size and not gather it so much.  I like the fact that it's quite 'swingy' but I'm slightly worried I'll be asked when I'm due...

Dolly was really useful - sometimes I just don't get what the pattern instructions say so I literally pinned it all out on her, and was able to work it all out.  Still wouldn't let anyone look inside it, mind you.

The lovely Abi came over and helped me with the measurements so I could pad Dolly out.  However I seem to have overpadded her (clothes that fit me are too tight on her),  so I need to have another go at her.  But still an excellent purchase.

I went into Broadwick Silks to get some lining to make a slipdress for under this.  I'm going to make another sheer overdress too, so went for a lilac colour to double up, one slip for two dresses.  Cheating, I know.  One of the very lovely girls working there overheard me buying this fabric and immediately piped up 'Is this for the wedding?' as she'd remembered me buying some silk there for Simplicity 6375 the other day.  Damn, I felt like I'd been caught with my hand in the sweetie jar.  Guess I had been.

PS I told friends the other day that I wasn't going to buy anything for my stash, and then went out the next day and somehow came home with eight metres.  Um, but this was in my stash, so technically I only acquired six metres - right?